Monday, April 27, 2009

Online Friends - Real or illusion?

A very frequent question that I encounter is "How do you spend your time alone?". For many people it is very difficult to digest and keep pestering me to get a roommate. I admit I have enjoyed each and every bit when I was staying with roommates. But they were my friends and we all knew each other quite well. Somehow I am not ready to share my space with a totally new person or someone I hardly know. And strangely now I am so used to staying alone that if someone else comes n stays with me for long I feel they are intruding into my personal space.(he he am I turning to an anti-social animal?)

Some days back I was talking with my friend who was home alone since his wife had gone home for delivery. He was saying it's too boring and he is not able to cope with that loneliness. He was wondering how I manage and I told him that I mostly spend time blog hopping and being online gives me a feeling that there are many people around me just a window away :P It doesn't really matter whether it is a chat window or a comment window in a blog. But he feels I'm addicted and having online friends is like an illusion - just an escape route. He thinks that it's only the common interests and things that we relate to and life is not just that. According to him online people are always nice to you, somehow not close to reality. I am not sure of this. I do have lot of good blog friends most of whom I haven't met or heard,some living in far off places, but feel very close to my heart. In fact I guess many of my online friends know much more about me and my feelings than someone I interact regularly in real world.

I would like to know your take on this? Do you share a good rapport with your online friends? Do you think it's an illusion?

Updated after Preeti's Comment : check her related post here

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Honest Confessions?



I've been awarded the Honest Scrap Award by Amal sometime back. It's my first online award and I’m so glad you like my blog and choose it for the award. Thanks a Ton Buddy :)

But the award comes with a "Terms and conditions apply" tag line.

“This award is bestowed upon a fellow blogger whose blog’s content or design is, in the giver’s opinion, brilliant.”

“When accepting this auspicious award, you must write a post bragging about it, including the name of the misguided soul who thinks you deserve such acclaim, and link back to the said person so everyone knows she/he is real. Choose a minimum of seven (7) blogs that you find brilliant in content or design. Or improvise by including bloggers who have no idea who you are because you don’t have seven friends. Show the seven random victims’ names and links and leave a harassing comment informing them that they were prized with Honest Weblog. Well, there’s no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon. List at least ten (10) honest things about yourself. Then pass it on!”


Don't you think this whole blog is about bragging? Why else would someone start a blog? And you already know who that misguided soul is. Guess what? More than the award I'm so glad I managed to successfully misguide at least one person :)

Now the seven random victims are Sandeep, gappa, Usha, Sharanya, Mishmash, Pareltank , Preeti. All of them maintain such brilliant and interesting blogs on varied topics and I never get tired of reading them. Yeh sure I'll leave the harassing comment to inform them about the award after I publish this post.
Now coming to the last and the toughest part. I have this habit of taking feedback about myself from friends(real world ones) and try to improve myself. And many a times I have got feedbacks like "One word to describe you is 'Paheli'" or "you are friendly to everyone but allow only very selected few into the privileged inner circle" or "Emotionally you are a closed book" or "You make others comfortable to share their secrets but you never share yours". And some friends who read my blog have told me that "You write so openly in your blog and it's like knowing a different person". How I wish I was the same in the blogging world with so many secrets that would make me look very mysterious and intriguing :( As it is there are no big secrets or happenings/controversial things in my life. On top of that with my penchant to write about anything and everything that affects me, it's very tough to dig up even 1 or 2 new things that I haven't yet written!! Anyway I guess I'll have to go to back to my infancy/school times to do that. So here are some random facts about me.

1) My parents had a late marriage and my mom was 40 years when I was born. And she seems to be really surprised to get a healthy child! Not a new thing since she is very fond of worrying about anything and everything

2) I was kidnapped by the maid servant when I was 6-7 months old. He took the ornaments, left me in a thenginkuzhi(a pit made around the coconut tree to keep water and manure) and ran off. I was found much later playing in my comfortable 'mud bed' blissfully unaware of the commotion. This incident and another near murder in my friend's house has made my mom paranoid of live-in servants.

3) I used to feel so lonely as a kid and longed for a sibling so badly. I even used to pester my parents to adopt a kid from the orphanage.

4) My all time favorite subject is Maths but I always managed to lose 1/2 - 1 marks by making careless mistakes!

5) I was an average student though out and have managed to pass all exams. But the final year ICT exam was so tough that I really thought I will get a supply(short form for supplementary exam that you need to take if you fail in an exam). I was so desperate after that exam and offered to do 108 pradakshinams in Guruvayoor if I pass. Even now I believe it was the effect of prayer that saved me. There is no way I could have passed that exam otherwise!

6) All through my school and college days I have skipped breakfast and I'm just not proud of it. That time I used to think I was so fat(even with a BMI of 19-20) and this was my idea of diet. Now it has screwed up my metabolism so badly :(

8) I never got fever during school days and used to wonder what it is like to have fever. But all the fascination went off when I got it the first time - a very high intensity one with a bad headache n vomiting for 3 days.

9) I was never into sports. Most of the PT classes, we used to spend inside the classrooms doing craft works or some other 'quiet tasks'. Mam used to bother us only if it's nearing Republic Day when school participated in the parade. So it's the same even now. Any physically demanding activity I'll try to keep a safe distance :P

10) My first hostel life was when I was in 3rd standard and I totally loved it. I was the younger most since hostel was available only from 5th std upwards. But I was admitted on special request for a short time and was thoroughly pampered by all the chechis , nuns and even the warden who was famous for her strict ways.

So that's it about me and didn't I tell you before that I always made careless mistakes in maths :D

Monday, April 06, 2009

Blogging Disasters

Last 2-3 days I was sleeping late and Friday was our Family Day. I was totally exhausted after that and so yesterday I slept nicely in the afternoon. I woke up feeling so fresh and was not in a mood to go back to sleep at my usual time. So as usual was in front of the comp and browsing/chatting was going on. That time my childhood friend came online. Talking of my childhood friends, none of them are in the IT industry and so very rarely we meet over chat. It's mostly phone calls or e-mails. Also the fact that all four of us are in different parts of the world doesn't make the communication part very easy. So I was thrilled to see her online and we started chatting although it was already wee hours of the morning. Some excerpts from our talk.

me: hi korangi
ss: hey how are u
i just woke up
me: good good :)
i need to go to sleep
it's already morning :(
ss: well talk about timings
any new trips planned/executed?
me: last was dandeli/karwar last month
ss: i saw and read your blog
me: oh ok
..
..
..
ss: You have gained wt?
me: yes. Who told you?
ss: from your blog
..
..
..
ss: how is kuttettan's baby?
saw her legs in ur blog ;)
me: :)
..
..
..
SS: How is B and H?
Remembered them when I read one of ur post abt them
me: $@#%#$^%$#@$#
how come you are knowing everything abt me n me totally dark abt u
ss: It's your blog dear
me: Then u too better start a blog. This is unfair


Don't you think this is totally unfair? And this is not the first time that I have encountered this type of one sided talks with close friends. Most of them are silent readers of my blog and never leave a comment. So I have no idea who is following the blog and then they surprise me when we call or meet. Talking of leaving comments, even I have the habit or reading a blog and come back silently mainly coz of sheer laziness. So I am not insisting on that. But to make it fair you should start updating me the news from your side too. So you,yeh 'YOU', do sit down and shoot a mail to me NOW, this very moment. Else I will be forced to stop blogging(not that I'm regular here) :P
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